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I haven't been in the ocean this summer, haven't even walked down to the beach, not even the one right by my house. I cannot bring myself to do it with part of my heart a thousand miles away. How do you explain to someone what it feels like to have your child taken from you? I've cared for so many mothers who know this pain, this out of body experience there are no words for. It can't be put in words but I'm going to try anyway. When you carry a baby, some of their cells cros

"I don't want to be numb. I don't want to be a zombie." I hear that from patients a lot and I understand. Years ago, back in the late 1900s, my doctor put me on a particular medication for my social anxiety and depression. My mood did improve but one day I was standing in the library on a computer (this was how we accessed the internet in olden times) chiming in on a message board discussion for my women's studies course and I realized I wasn't angry. And I really should hav

I was really angry recently. Livid. Enraged. Someone I had been respectful and kind with had reported me at work for a minor mistake which I'd sought to correct and had apologized for. I was telling a coworker about the situation and how angry I was about it and they said, there's a Disney song about this called "Let it Go." Surprisingly, this didn't calm me down. It made me mad. I'll tell you why. "mad libs" get it? because my first name is libby and I'm mad I'd found out ab

A patient’s family doctor called me to discuss her PMDD which was driving behaviors for which I was seeing her. The family clinician said the patient had mentioned trying Pepcid and an antihistamine for her symptoms and then said, “I looked it up but I couldn’t find any medical literature, just the… well, that it’s trending online.” And I got a twinge of shame. What kind of doctor was I, following internet trends instead of evidence based medicine? I wasn’t sure what to say

I had a nurse say to me recently that everyone these days thinks they have ADHD and TikTok is to blame. Had another nurse tell me her ADHD was diagnosed at age 30 and it's been life changing but she can't help but wonder how different her life may have been if she'd been diagnosed sooner. The question of whether ADHD is over or under diagnosed is a valid one but it can be a touchy subject. There's a lot of moving parts to consider and a lot of strong emotions on both sides. I